Don’t Make it Your Business!

How many times—just this year alone—have you opened your big fat mouth and weighed in on something that, really, had nothing to do with you? Even one is too many! Re-booters understand the tantalizing temptation to speak up and share our wisdom or our righteous indignation with others, only to discover that, Oooof! Perhaps we missed some relevant details or maybe we’re not as wise as we believed or (most likely at all) nobody cares what we think.  Plus, there’s always the unpleasant aftermath of wading into waters where we really needn’t go. Does any of this sound familiar to you?

Everybody does this. The trick, of course, is to learn to stop. Why go there? Is it really going to help matters? Or does letting your thoughts be known merely provide a visceral satisfaction to you? I know whereof I speak, my friends. Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt, and got my ass kicked along the way.

It just ain’t worth it.

Now, in previous posts, I have explored variations of this theme: the inadvisability of making an event or issue about you, etc etc. But, today, I am focusing in on matters that we know are not about us, and yet the urge to “participate” is ohsogreat. Know what I mean? It’s sorta like an itch; you become aware of something and then start to think about it. The urge grows; it becomes stronger, and sooner than we succumb to the itch.

Relax, breathe deeply.

Ok, so one of the core competencies of a successful Re-booter is mastering the art of keeping one’s mouth shut. Whether it’s as minor as inserting oneself into details related to who goes where and how they get there to the fiery finger-pointing associated with the break up of a long term relationship—stay out of it! Unless you are a marquis player, step aside. Otherwise, at least in my observation, things devolve to a point where you are caught up in a liturgical drama that promises no salvation whatsoever. We’ve already survived seventh grade once, why voluntarily go back? Do you get me? Capiche? Zip the mouthpiece.

As re-booters, we have all made our fair share of mistakes in this particular circus ring. It’s understandable because it’s so human. But we Re-booters can learn from our mistakes and rise above the temptation to let those around us know what’s what. In fact, when you think about this sort of hard-won knowledge and the ongoing, active self-discipline required to refrain from sharing our thoughts, I suppose it is a salvation. How much more secure and at peace I feel when I know I have not stepped into the fighting ring and have simply let others work things out themselves. It may not be as much fun to watch on the sidelines, but embracing this lesson and allowing people to negotiate their lives—and their frustrations–as they choose allows Re-booters to focus on more important things.


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